Ok so how funny is it we both got some inspiration and energy to blog tonight??? I have not read Gary's yet so appologies for any repitition.
Anniversaries have past, but Ben has kept me too busy and tired to write before now.
4/29 was 1 month with our son
4/30 Ben turned 17 months
Coming up 5/9 1 month home
But 5/9 is also Mother’s Day!! The first one in 40 years I can celebrate for it’s meaning to me and not hide out or ignore. Apologies to my Mom for all those years I ignored this day beyond sending her a card. Even going to the card aisle was tearful back then.
This year may bring some tears for the grief of the past and the joy of the present.
We wish we could celebrate with those we lost last year but rejoice for who are still in our lives now.
Ben has had his first doctor visit with vaccines and was a champ. Then blood work at labcorp from the vein, traumatic! We will be going to the Clifton office from now on because Shaka was wonderful after we left the office by our home angry and frustrated from a few missed attempts. We do need to learn by his example once it was over he was a happy boy that morning, mom and dad had to let go a bit more. I was quite emotionally exhausted that day.
Ben is still on the cusp of walking, he holds on still to one hand mostly. We just got him a Thomas the train walking riding toy to help with that and for some more fun things to do outside.
He has 3 new teeth coming in! and is really just drooly and a little cranky. He is an amazing kiddo.
Sleep time is still challenging, Mom and Dad limit staying in the room to 30 minutes or he just plays on and on no matter how tired he is. He has begun doing his version of downward facing dog as he unwinds to go to sleep. We need to try and get that on video it is just too funny. At nap time we do relaxation breathing (Benson’s mini exercise) he may learn to count backwards before forwards…oops. Coordinating naps has been my biggest challenge to structuring the day. When he lets me, I do reiki to the bump that fluctuates in size on his temple. I am working in my holistic pieces to parenting as I begin to relax into momhood.
Tonight was the first time he cried when he got out of the tub instead on when he got in! He was having the best time splashing his dad till he was SOAKED! And playing with the lil boat and turtles.
I seem to be the only one who thinks he’s starting to look shaggy and could use a trim of his hair…I will manage this before his welcome party 5/22.
We have been going out and enjoying the unusually sunny hot weather. He has been to Harriman park for a picnic and to Hoboken for an art and music festival. Yes we have been adding to his culture. Gary has begun his music education, Beatles and Rush top his favorites…hmmm…dad isn’t influencing him much ya think?
He is doing well with grandma and will stay with her while I do a few things around the house. Ant genocide in the living room… ugh don’t ask it was a traumatic Monday for mom with flashbacks to college when under the couch was a moving mass ooh bug. YUCK!
Seems the cat spends more time in the pack and play than ben does. JAX you crazy kitty.
To end, our thoughts and prayers go out to the many families we know who are traveling this week to meet their children in hina. God Bless.
with loving kindness
Nancy
Showing posts with label Adoption. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Adoption. Show all posts
Tuesday, May 4, 2010
Saturday, April 17, 2010
I’m sure everyone is eager for the first weeks report…
Gary is home so I have time to sneak on the laptop when Ben is awake and I am conscious enough to write coherently. By nighttime once Ben is in his crib sleeping I am quite exhausted. I am turning into a morning person for sakes of anything that needs much reading comprehension. Hmm this might bode poorly for studying for the holistic nurse certification. He sleeps well so if anyone wants to call in the evening no problem speaking is easier than reading or writing at that hour. So looks like up to 10p rule will be in force, not for the baby but just so you find me awake.
Ben got to see that mom has to cook now no more room service and that darn maid is no where to be found…LOL. He took the signs for do not disturb and please make up room from the hotel room he loved playing with them and I keep putting out that please make up room sign…darn!
Thankfully he likes his highchair so I can cook without worry of him crawling off somewhere. He can do this quite quickly I might add. Cleaning is more hit or miss and reorganizing after the flood will be completed this week when Daddy is home to help play or do things when Ben is awake. Mom is looking into the old fashioned playpen or play yards for safety and occasional ability to do something away from baby when needed. I’ve seen some we can use in the yard as well and since the river is back there this looks promising for some gardening this year.
Ben is sleeping through the night in his crib since Sunday night, he fusses some but not much. We are very blessed in that way. We are all back on NJ time.
Gary had to go right back to work but has taken vacation next week to have fun with us at home.
Ben and I are working on a routine for our day so it does not feel aimless and endless playing. The leap frog learning center has been a great addition to the play zone! Ben has his own cell phone already since his Aunt Christie showed him how to text he is a phone maniac…LOL. We discovered Sesame street is on too early for our interests and will need some DVDs for when Mom‘s energy fails around 4p.
He is standing well now and possibly going to be walking by next week since he has done a few push off steps to Mom when he is not tired. I need to find some grippy socks so walking is easer for him less slipping around. A visit to Strideright is planned for next week too once we chat with the pediatrician about walking shoes, are the white walkers still the best?
We visited Dad’s work this week and will visit Mom’s next week if all goes as planned. We went to coffee hour at my church last Sunday and will visit Grandma’s this Sunday. Grandpa and Aunt Kristen will be visited as well. So much already planned hopefully we will be able to do it all. House is my priority though once that is better I can relax more less things for him to get hurt on around.
Take care all we will occationaly post but mostly we will be playing with our son.
With Loving kindness
Nancy
Ben got to see that mom has to cook now no more room service and that darn maid is no where to be found…LOL. He took the signs for do not disturb and please make up room from the hotel room he loved playing with them and I keep putting out that please make up room sign…darn!
Thankfully he likes his highchair so I can cook without worry of him crawling off somewhere. He can do this quite quickly I might add. Cleaning is more hit or miss and reorganizing after the flood will be completed this week when Daddy is home to help play or do things when Ben is awake. Mom is looking into the old fashioned playpen or play yards for safety and occasional ability to do something away from baby when needed. I’ve seen some we can use in the yard as well and since the river is back there this looks promising for some gardening this year.
Ben is sleeping through the night in his crib since Sunday night, he fusses some but not much. We are very blessed in that way. We are all back on NJ time.
Gary had to go right back to work but has taken vacation next week to have fun with us at home.
Ben and I are working on a routine for our day so it does not feel aimless and endless playing. The leap frog learning center has been a great addition to the play zone! Ben has his own cell phone already since his Aunt Christie showed him how to text he is a phone maniac…LOL. We discovered Sesame street is on too early for our interests and will need some DVDs for when Mom‘s energy fails around 4p.
He is standing well now and possibly going to be walking by next week since he has done a few push off steps to Mom when he is not tired. I need to find some grippy socks so walking is easer for him less slipping around. A visit to Strideright is planned for next week too once we chat with the pediatrician about walking shoes, are the white walkers still the best?
We visited Dad’s work this week and will visit Mom’s next week if all goes as planned. We went to coffee hour at my church last Sunday and will visit Grandma’s this Sunday. Grandpa and Aunt Kristen will be visited as well. So much already planned hopefully we will be able to do it all. House is my priority though once that is better I can relax more less things for him to get hurt on around.
Take care all we will occationaly post but mostly we will be playing with our son.
With Loving kindness
Nancy
Tuesday, March 23, 2010
Travel time is so close...
We will leave tomorrow to do a great wall of china tour before officially meeting our travel group. Excitement is crackling the air as packing does the same to my nerves. I will try to stay as close to China's lower weigh limits but we may end up paying a little in fees for overage. I'll know more of that tonight when it is all together and ditributed between 2 suitcases and 2 carryons. I confess to being a chronic over packer so this is really hard.
Gary is working today since it is tax season and hard to get away. I am off so all the last minute details can be taken care of.
Luckily our flight is not untill 12:15p tomorrow so our ride isn't coming at any ungodly hour to pick us up. Hopefully I will be able to sleep with all the excitement and nerves.
Our taxes are being mailed today. YAY. One less thing to be concerned about now. And hopefuly refund money soon to help with my unpaid family leave.
In an attempt to make sure we had what we needed for "gift" I probably over purchased. That is weighing down the bags too. Oh well better to be covered. And by Nanjing that will all be gone.
Everyone keeps telling me do laundry in country and we will most likely but ...I still like having what I need. Which has expanded now to diapers , wipe, bottles, toys and blankies for baby boy Ben!
I hope he likes what I have set aside since we will all be in a hotel room for 11 days together before that long pane ride home. 15 1/2 hours is how long that trip direct from Hong Kong is. This will be a crazy parenting challenge with a 16 month old.
So the travel goes like this we fly into Beijing China a day after we leave. We will be able to tour the Great wall and the forbidden city/Tianamin square before we receive Benjamin. We stay here until 3/28 when we transfer to his province Jiangxu, capital city: Nanjing. We receive Benjamin Rui 3/29 and stay here until he receives his passport for travel. 4/2 we travel to Guangzhou for the last of the governmental paper work and medical check. 4/8 we travel to Hong Kong by train and will be flying home 4/9.
Now that things from travel are out of Ben's room there is walking space yay! I can't wait till he is home with us. It will be such a joy to have our little boy home at last!!
We have taken a few classes in speaking chinese but sadly I think I will still be completely lost if someone start speaking fast and in long sentences. One of the women in our travel party speaks Mandarin and we will have guides from the travel agency which will bridge the gap in language.
5 other wonderful couples are traveling with us. Some of them are also receiving their first child. Others are more experienced parents and have gone to China previously for an adoption. All good resources I am sure we will become quite close during this trip. I hope the children can stay friends as well as the parents.
That is all for now I must finish the packing.
Thank you all for your overwhelming support and prayers for safe travel.
Blessings
Nancy
Gary is working today since it is tax season and hard to get away. I am off so all the last minute details can be taken care of.
Luckily our flight is not untill 12:15p tomorrow so our ride isn't coming at any ungodly hour to pick us up. Hopefully I will be able to sleep with all the excitement and nerves.
Our taxes are being mailed today. YAY. One less thing to be concerned about now. And hopefuly refund money soon to help with my unpaid family leave.
In an attempt to make sure we had what we needed for "gift" I probably over purchased. That is weighing down the bags too. Oh well better to be covered. And by Nanjing that will all be gone.
Everyone keeps telling me do laundry in country and we will most likely but ...I still like having what I need. Which has expanded now to diapers , wipe, bottles, toys and blankies for baby boy Ben!
I hope he likes what I have set aside since we will all be in a hotel room for 11 days together before that long pane ride home. 15 1/2 hours is how long that trip direct from Hong Kong is. This will be a crazy parenting challenge with a 16 month old.
So the travel goes like this we fly into Beijing China a day after we leave. We will be able to tour the Great wall and the forbidden city/Tianamin square before we receive Benjamin. We stay here until 3/28 when we transfer to his province Jiangxu, capital city: Nanjing. We receive Benjamin Rui 3/29 and stay here until he receives his passport for travel. 4/2 we travel to Guangzhou for the last of the governmental paper work and medical check. 4/8 we travel to Hong Kong by train and will be flying home 4/9.
Now that things from travel are out of Ben's room there is walking space yay! I can't wait till he is home with us. It will be such a joy to have our little boy home at last!!
We have taken a few classes in speaking chinese but sadly I think I will still be completely lost if someone start speaking fast and in long sentences. One of the women in our travel party speaks Mandarin and we will have guides from the travel agency which will bridge the gap in language.
5 other wonderful couples are traveling with us. Some of them are also receiving their first child. Others are more experienced parents and have gone to China previously for an adoption. All good resources I am sure we will become quite close during this trip. I hope the children can stay friends as well as the parents.
That is all for now I must finish the packing.
Thank you all for your overwhelming support and prayers for safe travel.
Blessings
Nancy
Friday, March 19, 2010
Oh, oh, oh, oh...my little China ... boy
Nihao!
So here we are, Friday night, March 19. The flood waters have receded and the basement is dry once again. It was not a good week in the water in the basement category. Okay, so we didn't get 18" like last time, or even four feet. With the pump we had, we managed to keep it to under 2". Why do I tell you this here? Because while all that was going on, we had to make some travel arrangements because ...
(drum roll, please...)
We're leaving for China on Wednesday, March 24. Holy cow and good God. That's right, kind reader, we are China bound! I'm moving ever closer to the moment of utter dadness. I've never been a dad before (at least not in this lifetime. If I was in a past life, I don't remember it), so this is gonna be (as they song) a whole new world.
There are four other families that will be in Beijing and Guangzhou with us, one of them from Harrisburg, PA. It'll be nice traveling with a small group of Americans as we make our way through a foreign land, the Middle Kingdom (between Heaven and Earth), as it's called.
Arrive in Beijing after a 13 hour, 45 minute flight from Newark (which I way prefer over JFK or LaGuardia). We have our orientation there as well as a trip to the Great Wall, Tienanmen Square, and the Forbidden City. We even get to see a silk factory.
Then it's off to Nanjing, the capital of Jiangsu, the province where Ben's staying. Speaking of Ben, we are presented with him on March 29. The name of the city where the orphanage is, is Huai'an. I think we'll be getting a tour of the orphanage.
A few days later we're off to Guangzhou for all the bureaucratic stuff. Paperwork, medicals, visas, etc. I'm hoping we have a day to sneak over to the safari park. We're in China, we should see a panda or two, right? We have close to a week there to make sure everything's on the up and up. Ben needs to have all his papers in order.
Here's the cool part (one of the many cool parts): We leave China at 10:25 am on Friday, April 9th, fly for 15 hours, 30 minutes and arrive in Newark on Friday, April 9th at 1:55 pm. You do the math. Planetary rotation and time zones, and flying into the past. Does this mean that if we watch the news in China before we leave, we'll know what's going to happen in the US before anyone else does?
As Linus once said to Charlie Brown: Take consolation that the world can't end tomorrow because somewhere in the world, it already is tomorrow.
That's the travel plans. Plenty of writing time as we cross the country and the Pacific Ocean. I'll wave at you West Coasters as we go over ya!
I'm hoping to upload pix as we go, so you can all share our journey with us.
Talk to you soon.
Peace,
Gary . . .
So here we are, Friday night, March 19. The flood waters have receded and the basement is dry once again. It was not a good week in the water in the basement category. Okay, so we didn't get 18" like last time, or even four feet. With the pump we had, we managed to keep it to under 2". Why do I tell you this here? Because while all that was going on, we had to make some travel arrangements because ...
(drum roll, please...)
We're leaving for China on Wednesday, March 24. Holy cow and good God. That's right, kind reader, we are China bound! I'm moving ever closer to the moment of utter dadness. I've never been a dad before (at least not in this lifetime. If I was in a past life, I don't remember it), so this is gonna be (as they song) a whole new world.
There are four other families that will be in Beijing and Guangzhou with us, one of them from Harrisburg, PA. It'll be nice traveling with a small group of Americans as we make our way through a foreign land, the Middle Kingdom (between Heaven and Earth), as it's called.
Arrive in Beijing after a 13 hour, 45 minute flight from Newark (which I way prefer over JFK or LaGuardia). We have our orientation there as well as a trip to the Great Wall, Tienanmen Square, and the Forbidden City. We even get to see a silk factory.
Then it's off to Nanjing, the capital of Jiangsu, the province where Ben's staying. Speaking of Ben, we are presented with him on March 29. The name of the city where the orphanage is, is Huai'an. I think we'll be getting a tour of the orphanage.
A few days later we're off to Guangzhou for all the bureaucratic stuff. Paperwork, medicals, visas, etc. I'm hoping we have a day to sneak over to the safari park. We're in China, we should see a panda or two, right? We have close to a week there to make sure everything's on the up and up. Ben needs to have all his papers in order.
Here's the cool part (one of the many cool parts): We leave China at 10:25 am on Friday, April 9th, fly for 15 hours, 30 minutes and arrive in Newark on Friday, April 9th at 1:55 pm. You do the math. Planetary rotation and time zones, and flying into the past. Does this mean that if we watch the news in China before we leave, we'll know what's going to happen in the US before anyone else does?
As Linus once said to Charlie Brown: Take consolation that the world can't end tomorrow because somewhere in the world, it already is tomorrow.
That's the travel plans. Plenty of writing time as we cross the country and the Pacific Ocean. I'll wave at you West Coasters as we go over ya!
I'm hoping to upload pix as we go, so you can all share our journey with us.
Talk to you soon.
Peace,
Gary . . .
Monday, March 8, 2010
We received our USCIS clearance today!!
So for all you who have been following along our USCIS clearance update has arrived For all those who can follow the alphabet soup of all of this, that is from the I 600process which is the I 171H clearance.
What this means is, once this form is received in China's consulate, we can make our consulate appointments and set our travel date.
We are a huge step closer to bringing home Ben!!
We will have Ben home before mother's day and Fathers day this year most likely. How excellent is that!!!
I am contacting the agency and sending the faxed copy off in the am so this can keep on moving forward.
There is so much to get done now and some serious packing and baby proofing needs to be moved up on the priority list here.
Keep up the prayers we need them.
Patience strength hope and love
Nancy
What this means is, once this form is received in China's consulate, we can make our consulate appointments and set our travel date.
We are a huge step closer to bringing home Ben!!
We will have Ben home before mother's day and Fathers day this year most likely. How excellent is that!!!
I am contacting the agency and sending the faxed copy off in the am so this can keep on moving forward.
There is so much to get done now and some serious packing and baby proofing needs to be moved up on the priority list here.
Keep up the prayers we need them.
Patience strength hope and love
Nancy
Wednesday, March 3, 2010
China adoption process and information
for any one who has more questions about china programs and adoption
here is a link http://www.babyjellybeans.com/web/do/site/folder?ID=121761&parent_id=121761 to a friends blog she has said it so well I feel it is silly to attempt recreating her information here.
Enjoy.
Nancy
here is a link http://www.babyjellybeans.com/web/do/site/folder?ID=121761&parent_id=121761 to a friends blog she has said it so well I feel it is silly to attempt recreating her information here.
Enjoy.
Nancy
Friday, February 26, 2010
when it all started...china adoption
For those of you who do not know our history. I thought I'd add a little here. After we were unsucessful in 2 domestic adoption over 3 years we decided to re- assess our plan. We decided to explore an adoption through China. The china program was a stable one and had a good history. We were told there were changes coming and luckily we were able to send our dossie to China before they went into place. Our log in date, LID, was 5/16/07.
Then we sat back for the wait expecting it to be 9-18 months before we would meet our daughter. Remember previously adoptable children were predominantly girls.
When the wait time grew and grew many of our friends, family, and acquaintances began asking why we did not change countries or why didn't we adopt from the USA (domestic). Seems someone always takes the opposite point of view to any issue.
We explained you could not be listed in more than one country at the time and that it was quite costly. Also we had an issue with our original agency having to close.(it was a very stressful 2008 while we waited to see if our dream was ending again) When we were moved to Holt it became our 4th agency and we just couldn't go through all that paperwork again! We are grateful to Seedlings for choosing Holt as the takeover program.
Our 4th agency turned into our blessing. Holt has access to the China Child of promise (COP) program. COP is a minor correctable health conditions listing of waiting children. After alot of soul searching we chose to list in this program, as well as stay on the standard list. (Standard program has now matched children up to @april 2006- wait time is 42-47 months and still lengthening) We were told boys were also available and we said we would be open to either a Boy or Girl. Really... think about it if we had become pregnant, God would have choosen then too, so we gave it up to him for finding our baby. We joined COP in August 2009.
After 4 months of nail biting through each listing we received our call. Ben's health condition is truely minor which was another blessing. I think God knew we had had our fill of illness after 2009.
We sent in our LOI to tell China we were interested in adopting him on 12/2/09.
China sent us our Letter of acceptance to confirm this 1/14/2010. Then we waited for the next approval from China - Travel authority (TA). This came as we awaited an update on our home study 2/8/2010. We are currently in a holding pattern for USCIS clearance and update on our prior I-171 approval to include a boy up to age 2y with a special need. Once this arrives our agency will ask for a consulate appointment in China for Ben and we can set our travel dates.
Then we sat back for the wait expecting it to be 9-18 months before we would meet our daughter. Remember previously adoptable children were predominantly girls.
When the wait time grew and grew many of our friends, family, and acquaintances began asking why we did not change countries or why didn't we adopt from the USA (domestic). Seems someone always takes the opposite point of view to any issue.
We explained you could not be listed in more than one country at the time and that it was quite costly. Also we had an issue with our original agency having to close.(it was a very stressful 2008 while we waited to see if our dream was ending again) When we were moved to Holt it became our 4th agency and we just couldn't go through all that paperwork again! We are grateful to Seedlings for choosing Holt as the takeover program.
Our 4th agency turned into our blessing. Holt has access to the China Child of promise (COP) program. COP is a minor correctable health conditions listing of waiting children. After alot of soul searching we chose to list in this program, as well as stay on the standard list. (Standard program has now matched children up to @april 2006- wait time is 42-47 months and still lengthening) We were told boys were also available and we said we would be open to either a Boy or Girl. Really... think about it if we had become pregnant, God would have choosen then too, so we gave it up to him for finding our baby. We joined COP in August 2009.
After 4 months of nail biting through each listing we received our call. Ben's health condition is truely minor which was another blessing. I think God knew we had had our fill of illness after 2009.
We sent in our LOI to tell China we were interested in adopting him on 12/2/09.
China sent us our Letter of acceptance to confirm this 1/14/2010. Then we waited for the next approval from China - Travel authority (TA). This came as we awaited an update on our home study 2/8/2010. We are currently in a holding pattern for USCIS clearance and update on our prior I-171 approval to include a boy up to age 2y with a special need. Once this arrives our agency will ask for a consulate appointment in China for Ben and we can set our travel dates.
Our referral call
So after the amzing grief our family had experience through most of 2009, a promise for the future came to us on 12/1/09.
When our adoption social worker called me at work to tell me we were matched with a baby boy who had just turned 1 years old, I was floored.
So much was rushing through my mind and heart.
Could we really hope and be happy again?
It appeared we could! We can!
Luo Rui was perfect and I knew then, as I heard his information and tried to process all of this, that he would be our son.
We did all the formal steps, sent in our LOI, and sent the medical information to an international pediatric doctor.
She gave us a good report the next morning!
So began our Journey to Benjamin Rui...our journey of JOY and LOVE to China to bring home Our Son to his Forever Family.
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